Closing the bones
Closing the bones (or birth) or the sealing ceremony is so important for many reasons. It’s quite an ‘open’ experience as women go through childbirth. Everything during labour is about opening; opening physically, opening emotionally and opening spiritually. However, once the baby is born, the body requires closing (the bones) or sealing it and it requires bringing ‘chi’ or ‘prana’ back to the centre channels, the energetic space at our core that we once shared with a tiny baby. Our bodies must rebalance as that what was full is now empty and that what was shared can find its own rhythm again. This could be done energetically with Reiki healing, sound healing, intentions as well as using Rebozo’s. Childbirth is such an amazing and raw experience but that openness can leave us empty afterwards and can leave us feeling quite vulnerable. It’s about finding restoration again, about rebalancing and about honouring your body, your sacred vessel so you can become your shining whole again.
Closing the bones and the sealing ceremony closes the birthing process as she transitions into motherhood. This is a sacred time setting, a celebration and a way to nurture mum and baby. There are many ways of doing this but first we would start by creating sacred space, smudging and setting the room up. We could then gather, drink herbal teas and listen to her birth story. This is so important for the mother as her story needs to be heard and truly acknowledged. She could then if she wished, have a ceremonial bath filled with rose petals and essential oils. This symbolically wash away the birth and recharges her with femininity and beauty. Afterwards she might like to have a back rub with warm oils. She would then be asked to lie down where rebozo techniques would be used followed by a warm oil rub around her abdomen. This would be done with crushed ayurvedic herbs wrapped in a cloth pouch with warm oil and hot stones. Warm lavender/flaxseed pouches would also be placed around her to warm her up even more. Beautiful blessings would be read as she is gently tied up and tucked in at key points on her body and she would lay there for a resting period enveloped in warmth.
She could even be gifted a beautiful journal to write her birth story with uplifting quotes, baby’s footprint or cast, pictures and messages after the resting period.
The essence of all this is about honouring new mothers, honouring their process and each mother deserving of having the space to be held, warmed and honoured and made to feel loved. When we limit our care to just when a woman is pregnant, we loose the focus of the vital role that women have in birth, life and creation.
This ceremony can be done 6 hours after a mother has given birth providing normal delivery.
Hi Pammie, thank you for allowing me to come to your home today, for holding space for me and for closing my bones and my body. Wow. Just wow. I am processing so much and tonight I held back tears, of joy. It was beautiful I felt such a different, deeper connection to my son and so much has changed in my mind. It was just so beautiful. I never knew how much I needed this. It’s reinforced my belief in why it’s needed for everyone. And I still believe you don’t have to be a mother to benefit. I still believe this offers healing at the very core of the feminine energy, no matter where you are in life. But thank you, thank you – Helen D
It was lovely to meet you and thank you for the lovely sealing ceremony! It was so physically relaxing, deeply emotional and thoroughly satisfying to have your warm hands performing the closing of my body, your wise & loving words in my head and your deep spiritual presence in my house with my baby. Huge thanks for that magical moment of us with the baby and angels in the room, a heart warming chat that released my tensions/thoughts/emotional build up and a motherly hug that melted my heart and lifted my spirits baby and I slept peacefully for 2 hours after you left and felt much better and physically and emotionally stronger after. Bless you, Pam. – Marina Nikita.
A thousand blessings to you and your magic hands and to the love you gave me… It’s exactly what I needed. Something to help me release the trauma and go easy on myself. Thank you so much – K.C.
During pregnancy, hormones cause ligaments to stretch, which loosens the pelvic floor structure. This natural realignment allows the pelvic bones to open for the baby’s birth and makes a mama feel a bit wobbly on her feet.
After birth the pelvic floor can remain loose and unstable for up to five months. Having the belly bind speeds up the whole process, realigns everything and relieves the back pain associated with the immediate postnatal period. This also helps reduce the strain involved in lifting and carrying a baby as well and provides back support when breastfeeding when most mums don’t realise they are even slouching.
The bellybinding firming paste is made with warming ingredients and spices for you to put on before the belly bind and with a tank top of your own choice. The ingredients are ground tumeric, cloves, ginger, cinnamon, cumin, kaffir lime, cardamon. Mix around 2-3 tablespoons of the ingredients with 2-3 tablespoons of warm coconut or olive oil until it’s a thick-consistency paste.
It’s advised to wear the bellybind as much as possible for the first 6 weeks. Ideally you should begin to wear it as soon as you can after giving birth, around day 5. Try and wear it for around 10-12 hours a day in the beginning if possible, and then continue to wear it for at least 40 days or even longer if you are not satisfied. C-section mamas should wait around 6 weeks until their incision is mostly healed before being wrapped. Contraindications: May not be worn in the case of a fallen uterus.
I make and sell the bengkung belly binds and the belly firming paste so these can be bought directly from me. These are packed beautifully, come with instructions and am happy to ship worldwide. Please note that these are all made to order so please allow sufficient time before ordering. The cost for a batik (malayasian material) bengkung belly bind is £95 plus p & p. To buy a bellybind press this link. For overseas shipping, please contact me for prices. Finally, the herbal firming paste does not come in a jar but will be sent in a resealable bag.
- Closing the bones ceremony (inc. warm oil back massage & Reiki & guided meditation) – £165 + travel
- Closing the bones & Bellybinding Service (inc. the bellybind) – £195 + travel
The belly bind is great! I’ve used it for 7 days post birth for half a day and already feel straighter and firmer! Thank you, – C. Nielsen, Bucks.
I was so excited when I found Pamela. I was very keen to use the Bengkung belly binding as part of my healing process post-birth and it seemed no one in London was offering this. Luckily for me, Pamela came to the rescue. She made the most lovely binding material for me and premixed the herbs for the paste. Because we live too far from each other for her to provide hands on help with the binding, she took the time to walk me through the process over the phone and made me feel confident that I could do it myself. She also provided detailed instructions on how to apply the binding material and paste in the beautiful package she made for me. I now feel better prepared knowing that I can help my body recover so that I am in the best possible health to take care of my baby. Thank you Pamela for making this possible for me!” H. Masri